Formula For Improving Your Piping

Take it one step at a time. Identify the problem. FIX IT! Identify another problem. FIX IT! Repeat as necessary until it is all FIXED!!

- Oscar Rogers

Maxville - Conclusion

I said the storm began to subside, but the weather never really cleared. The rest of the day alternated between light drizzle and steady rain. It's not like a little more precipitation mattered. At this point, it wouldn't have mattered if the skies had cleared and a huge hair dryer had descended from the heavens in a divine act of drying, everything and everyone was hopelessly, irreversibly saturated. Oddly, our so-called rain capes do very little to repel water. Someone really ought to write a letter to the manufacturer. In fact they seem to absorb and hold moisture. So what happens when you put a rain cape over a wool pipe band uniform is that you quickly become both soggy and sweaty. You move about in your own personal bubble of rainforest-like atmosphere. The only solace one has is the knowledge that one's fellow bandmates are equally as uncomfortable. It's essentially a team-building exercise.

The storm quieted and a contingent headed out to discover the plan for resuming the contest. Of course we went to the beer tent, which may seem like a self-serving decision on our part, but in fact the beer tent is where pipe bands go when the weather goes sour. OK, the beer tent is where pipe bands go regardless of the weather, but the point is that it made sense to be where our fellow competitors were.

The tent was a sea of black rain capes. In one corner, a band was passing a set of pipes, belting out fast-fingered tunes in an effort to fuel the ceilidh. Everyone jostled about trading cash for tokens, tokens for beer and beer for stories of the day's chaos. Not long after we arrived, the Chief Steward came by to announce plans to resume the competition. The PPBSO might be criticized for waiting so long on the day to halt the events, given the dangerous weather, but I give them credit for maintaining good humor in dealing with a difficult situation. As the Chief Steward, an old Scottish expat whose speech retained a hint of a brogue, addressed the beer tent, explaining the times and locations where the competitions would resume, one obnoxious bandsman (probably a drummer) shouted, "No massed bands!"

"Shut yure cake hole!" the steward fired back, without missing a beat. The crowd roared with approval.

The steward then took off to go spread the word about the competition. Ten minutes later, he was back. At this point, he was beer tent favorite and the group quickly fell silent to hear his next proclamation. He rolled up in a golf cart and, like Eisenhower addressing the troops, he stepped forward and questioned, "Are there any members from the Midlothian Scottish Pipe Band here? Anyone from Midlothian?" A hush prevailed. No band members came forth.

"Alright then," he said. "Keep drinkin!"

Again cheers erupted from the tent. This guy was our hero and the best entertainment a beer tent full of weary, waterlogged pipe bands could ask for.

By the time the band competed for the second time it must have been after 5 PM. Everyone was sodden and exhausted and it's fair to say that we didn't play our best. Band competion continued until well past the time we normally would have played the closing massed bands. The rain picked up again. There were rumors of a closing ceremony being held in the big beer tent, but no official word came through. Some of the band packed it in and headed back to the hotel. Others of us headed to the big tent to grab a couple pints and await the contest results. Large swaths of the beer tent were under water. To get anywhere in the tent, you had to negotiate greasy mud pits.

In the end, the best summary of Maxville that I heard was that it was a day of extremes. It was the earliest the band had ever competed at a Games and also the latest. Of course, the weather was certainly extreme as well. I don't think any of us regret being there though. It was a lot of fun and an epic competition. A typical Games day seems tame by comparison. Writing this now, it occurs to me that some of our band members probably tucked soggy rain capes into their pouches after Maxville and never took them out to dry when they got home. The next games we're at where it rains, you'll be able to spot the Schenectady Pipe Band. We'll be the guys wearing the fuzzy green rain capes. You'll smell us from across the massed bands field. At least the capes will match our kilts . . .

Running Season stats:

QMMs Played: 3
Cake Holes Shut: 1
Kilt Hose Casualties: Too gross to tally exact figures

Maxville Part Deux

I guess the storm began about 2:30 PM. It's difficult to convey the full violence of the typhoon that bore down on us. This thing meant business. You could feel the thunder reverberate in your chest. Lightning, which came way too close to us, hissed and snapped across the sky. You had to lean into the wind to avoid being shoved around and even under the tent rain pelted us. And so, faced with an extreme and potentially life-threatening situation, the band elected to do what we do best: we partied.
What else could we do really? The band donned rain capes and dug in. Maybe it was the energy in the air from the storm, or the fact that we imbibed so heartily, believing that every sip might be our last, but whatever the reason, things got a little crazy. Everyone huddled in the middle of the tent to shield the snack table and share body heat. Out in the gale, games spectators ran for their cars and their lives, zig-zagging to avoid the lightning strikes. As one shirtless young man ran past the tent, Jennifer Munro, well on her way from a mix of LaBatts and muscle-relaxers, shouted for him to "take it off!" Clearly sensing he had nothing to lose, and without breaking his stride, the guy promptly dropped his shorts to oblige Jenn's request. It was then that I knew there would be no turning back for this party train.

The wind blew so hard that it nearly lifted our tent off the ground. I felt sure the tent would rip apart, leaving our entire encampment exposed and at the mercy of the downpour. But with our help to anchor it in place, the tent withstood Mother Nature's pummeling. In hindsight, it may not have been a great idea for us all to stand around in a lightning storm holding on to metal poles, but it seemed necessary at the time.

Remarkably, while all this was happening, the pipe band contest had not yet been officially postponed. We didn't know for sure if we were supposed to be tuning up to play in the final round of the Grade 4 contest. Our scheduled time to play fell right at the peak of the heavy weather. As the storm finally began to subside, a few us slogged off to go find out if and when the competition would resume.

- JSS

Note on the text: Thanks to various band members and friends from whom I steal all the pictures that accompany these entries. Primarily MJK and RSF.

Summer Retrospective - Part IV

The summer season was now in full swing and the band headed north to Maxville, Ontario to compete at the North American Pipe Band Championship on August 2. This year Maxville truly demonstrated its status as a continental event, drawing pipe bands from across the United States and Canada and even a band from Mexico City, the St. Patrick's Battalion Pipe Band. Maxville is a grueling competition on the best of days. With twenty five bands competing in Grade 4 this year, the sheer number of competitors necessitated a qualifying round to establish the field of bands who would ultimately compete for the top prize. So, instead of one performance, a successful band must play twice, which of course allows for twice the opportunities for something to go wrong. One might also argue that it makes a win twice as sweet. In any case, Maxville means more playing and tough competition, as the Ontario piping scene is home to a number of very strong Grade 4 pipe bands. Little did we know, however, as the day began, that the pipe band competition would be the least of our worries!

The Grade 4 qualifier began fairly early, around 10:30 AM and we were among the first to play in our qualifying heat of thirteen bands. Remarkably, everyone, including the pipe major, managed to arrive at the field on time that morning and so the band was fairly settled and well-prepared for the first round. The exception might be Kennie Farrigan, however, whose chanter fell out of his pipes on the walk over to the final tuning area, much to his chagrin. His reed did not survive the fall. Rarely has hemp so quickly been applied to a chanter or a back-up reed so hastily selected. Kennie was back in rank just before the steward came to tell us we were on. The band fell into formation and marched off (apparently a bit too quickly for the drummers) to meet our destiny.

We came off the field feeling confident about the first run. The usual post-performance self-evaluation suggested no major mishaps. It would be at least an hour before we knew if the judges agreed with our assessment. With one run down, the band headed back to camp to refuel and await opening massed bands.

Massed bands was hot. The sun beat down on us and our black vests and glengarries drank in the rays. We simmered on the shadeless massed bands field while something like a hundred pipe bands slowly assembled. Occasionally, a cloud would pass overhead, offering momentary relief from the burn. I remember praying fervently for more clouds, so maybe it was my fault that clouds aplenty would soon roll our way.

The afternoon featured good news and bad news. The good news was that the band successfully qualified to play in the final. We were, in fact, the only American band in our grade to do so. So we were psyched about that. The bad news was that the storm of the century was about to collide with Maxville.

Summer Retrospective - Part III

With our first win safely tucked away, this Pipe Major headed south to Da Beach for a brief respite from the Right, Quick, March as it were. It's important to stay focused, however, even while on vacation. Thus, beach time was devoted to catching up on old issues of the EUSPBA Voice.

As the old Scots used to say, 'The band that vacations in unison plays in unison' and so the Pipe Major rendezvoused at the beach with the ever-vigilent Drum Sergeant, who daily stood watch upon the shore, scanning the horizon for signs of a Guinness tanker in distress. Piper Jenn Munro was also on hand, serving as sandwich and Jello shot maker. Meanwhile, back home in Schenectady, the band prepared (so I'm told) for the next weekend of competition, which was to be a double-header: Glasgowlands and Rockland.

Plans changed, however, with the arrival of new band aspirant Sadie Logan Munro, born July 17, 2008! Proud Dad and Grade 4 Drum Sergeant Iain Munro decided to stay home that weekend to go over the basic drum rudiments with his new daughter and so, with the loss of our Lead Tip, and being short a few other players as well, we decided to cancel Glasgowlands and Rockland. Now that I think about it, Rockland was also a medley competition, and we weren't ready to introduce the red-headed step child to the competition scene just yet. So there were multiple reasons for the cancellation. But we never look back! From that point preparations began for the North American Championships in Maxville, Ontario . . .

At left, Sadie Logan and Aunt Jenn "Jello Shot Maker" Munro.



Running Season stats:

QMM Performances: 1
New Babies: 1
Jello Shots: Many

Summer Retrospective - Part II

Our first competition of the summer was the Round Hill Highland Games in Norwalk, CT. Conspicuously absent from this year's games were the soccer players. Round Hill always used to have a soccer tournament, which was odd in that the soccer event seemed completely independent of the rest of the games. It was as if the organizers had double-booked the venue and were unwilling to turn either group away. Aside from the occasional beaning from a stray ball, the pipe bands had no contact with the soccer match.

Round Hill was a risky choice for our first competition this year because the contest fell on July 5. The band plays an Independence Day parade in Schroon Lake every year that entails a healthy dose of celebrating, so there was potential to be exhausted and a bit hungover for Round Hill. Fortunately, the band has trained to operate under such adverse conditions and we were able to rally on the day. We won the competition. We were off to a good start.

Season Stats:

QMM's played: 1

Summer Retrospective

Blog? What blog? Yes, it's been a while since our last entry. A pipe band summer affords little spare time. The most you can do is wash your socks, detox and prepare for the next gig. But the Schenectady Pipe Band season has finally come to a close (or so we THOUGHT, freakin' band manager and his Halloween parade . . . grumble, grumble). So it seems that now is a good time to pause, take a deep breath and remember Summer 2008.

When last we spoke, dear Reader, it was early July, the band's performance season was wrapping and we were about to launch out on the pipe band competition circuit. One might sum up the 2008 competition season in three words: QUICK MARCH MEDLEY. For those unfamiliar with the pipe band competition format, pipe bands in our class, Grade 4, are asked to prepare 2 separate selections of music with which to compete. These selections are classified as a quick march medley (QMM) and a medley. One might understandably be confused by the nomenclature with its overlapping use of the term "medley". It confuses us too.

"OK guys, let's play the medley!"

"The Quick March Medley?"

"No! The MEDLEY Medley!!"

And so it goes. In any case, the QMM is a more regimented (a.k.a boring) format, wherein all the tunes must be of a single type (you guessed it, quick marches). This format is meant to force the less experienced pipe bands to focus on the fundamentals of the discipline without getting caught up in the more complex types of pipe band music. Performing the QMM is like trying to paint a picture with only one color. On the other hand, the Medley allows pipe bands to put together a program of all sorts of tunes, including jigs, reels, and some of the other more upbeat music from the piping repertoire. Generally speaking, the medley has more variety and thus it is more fun to play. Whether a band will perform its medley or QMM at a particular contest is dictated by the date of the event. On even days, Grade 4 plays medley; on odd days, QMM.

As it turns out, EVERY contest we entered for July and August was QMM. A QMM summer presented two problems: first, it was somewhat monotonous; second, pipe bandspeople being the hard-nosed pragmatists that we are, if we don't HAVE to practice something, we don't. And so it was that the medley became the red-headed step child of the summer, languishing on the back burner, awaiting an even day contest that would never come . . . until Capital District. More on that later.

So the stage was set.

- JSS